Posts tagged getting married
Andrea didn’t try to lose weight for her wedding and, strangely, the whole day was not ruined.
Hitched: Your Elaborately Planned Public Marriage Proposal Is Awkward For Everyone - The Frisky
“I wouldn’t call it an accident that, in the year before my own wedding, I watched several long-time friends tie their respective knots. Hell, I’m a 28-year-old middle-class white person. For people like me, there comes a summer in all of our lives when weekends are full of nuptials and related activities. Even if you’re not invited to them all, one’s Facebook feed alone can be a staggering play-by-play of the same party, held over and over and over again with slightly different hosts.
I’m thinking about all this because of a really thoughtful piece from Lyla Cicero’s Role/Reboot wherein she wonders of her own wedding-amongst-weddings, “Was I basking in the glow of doing the popular thing, rather than in the glow of marriage itself?”
It’s a question that every couple should ask themselves — and ultimately one that I had to ask myself, too. Am I getting married — or do I want to get married—because my friends seem to have a great time doing it, themselves?”
I had a drunk thought, on that patio back in Hawaii, about how great it would be if you could “marry” your friends. If, after you’d been “with” your best friends for a long time, you could actually get them legally recognized as your family members. It’d be great for all kinds of reasons — hospital visits and legal issues of course — not least the fact that other people in the world would be obligated to see you as a family unit. I know people like to believe they don’t care what others think — but for real, being in a legally recognized partnership does actual feel different, and have different consequences, than just being really, really partnered with someone. (via Hitched: Let’s All Get Married! All Of Us! - The Frisky)
Hitched: I’m A Married Motherf**ker! - The Frisky
Last night, my husband (!) Patrick and I were having Hawaiian martinis at Roy’s Waikoloa Bar & Grill (which is to Hawaii the way Chili’s is to Texas) when he asked me, Was it all worth it? Was all the stress and the arguing and the pressure worth it, to have a wedding instead of sneaking down to the courthouse or eloping to Las Vegas?
I had my answer ready, because I’d been thinking on it since we drove back to our hotel in a pick-up truck covered in dicks on Saturday night. My answer was: yes. All of the bullshit and the pressure and the stress was completely worth the experience of being married in front of all of our closest family and friends.
I felt strong and beautiful and happy and supported, in that pick-up truck covered in dicks. I felt blissed and blessed, in that pick-up truck covered in dicks. I felt like the exact thing that I’d wanted to happen had happened. The whole reason I’d consented to a capital-W Wedding in the first place was that I knew I needed other people to affirmatively answer the question, “Hey! Did you guys hear that?” about the fact that I’d met a man I loved and that I wanted to share my life with. I told myself I would do a Wedding because doing a Wedding would make my commitment to Patrick and our existence as “Patrick and Andrea” in the world more solidified and more real. And that shit actually happened, ya’ll.
10 Perfectly Good Reasons To Postpone A Wedding - The Frisky
“Hanging out with people who don’t care about your wedding is a wonderful thing. Maybe for you that’s parking it at the bar and shooting the shit with your favorite bartender. Or making sure not to miss your rec-league softball game. When I went and got a manicure this week, I made sure not to wear my engagement ring because holy God, I did not even want “weddings” to be anywhere near a point of conversation while the nice lady drilled away at my cuticles.
Whoever they are, people who don’t want to see 10 photos of your dress or hear about your super-clever guestbook idea may be the best kind of people to spend time with right now. I’m about to spend an entire weekend with people who love and adore me and who want the best for me and because of that, they want me to have the happiest wedding ever. Which is wonderful. But also exhausting. So it’s nice to not have to perform “bride” for a few moments.”
“Bachelorette parties are spin-offs, obviously, of bachelor parties, which began, hundreds of years ago, as a dinner the bridegroom threw for his buddies before the wedding. In the spirit of gender equality, bachelorette parties were borne of the sexual revolution of the 1960s. All well and good! More gender equality! Yet somehow, they’ve turned, stereotypically speaking, into debaucherous nights of embarrassment and ill-fated frivolity. I dreaded that for myself.
Don’t get me wrong, I am all about frivolity. And debauchery. What I’m not all about is the pressure to participate in something epic that would be tied into some kind of statement about who I am as a woman and, soon, a wife. I don’t need a “last chance” at fun, because I don’t expect that being married will somehow strip me of my ability to enjoy myself.
April 20th, 2012 is not the last day of freedom I’ll ever have. It’s not the last time a friend can call me and say “Hey, I’ve had a shit day, can we get some beers”? It’s not the last time I’ll ever be fun. It’s just the day before my wedding.”
